end-of-year musings

hello everybody,

nothing much to report other than a) i still haven't started studying, b) loving chili more and more everyday, and c) i wish i didn't have to go back to london and write exams! i know there's no point in wishing for impossible things (one of my fave cure songs), but sometimes i really wish i didn't have to go back to school for another four years in order to become a pharmacist. i want to start practising as a pharmacist NOW. a part of me wants these next four years to fly by quickly, but another part of me knows that these next four years might be the best experience in my life, and by the end of it i'll wish it hadn't gone by so fast.

what to say about 2005? emotionally tumultuous. my relationship/ex-relationship with t, and all the highs and lows associated with it, is enough to make me emotionally spent. getting fucked over by u of t - again - and finally knowing where i'll be doing my pharmacy degree - that was emotional upheaval too. moving to another country two-thirds into the year, starting a new chapter and a new life. meeting new people that i wouldn't have met if all this didn't happen, and reuniting with old friends. all very strange, exciting, scary and new.

i am looking forward to 2006. there's something about a new year that's so special, the absolute promise of endless possibilities. all i hope for is the continued happiness and health of my loving family and friends.

CET

latest pics of chili

here are some pics of chili taken yesterday. my cousin bought him a little adidas outfit (oh god, here we go with the clothes)...

chili is getting SO big! in one week alone he has grown so much. he needs to get his second vaccination before we can take him outside; it'll be good to start walking him as he needs the fresh air and stimulating environment.

CET

post-christmas report

holy, four days without a post - i was getting antsy!

brief rundown on the last few days:

24th-parental mahjong activities. two of the ladies they played mahjong with were BLOODY annoying, especially the one telling us how to raise our chili, because she's an expert on dogs of course. ugh.

25th-hung out with canuckian, dad and chili until my mom, aunt, grandma and cousin came home from the temple. you can tell who the demon seeds are in the family, eh? we opened gifts and it was such a lovely time; chili was playing with the paper and getting into the christmas tree. he has made this christmas extra special, even if he pees where he shouldn't sometimes.

26th-first day where we ALL left the house, leaving chili alone for two hours. it was more traumatic than i thought - not for chili, but for me! i was so worried about him - my dad thought chili would bark and bark until he fainted - but when we came home he was okay! a little shaken up i think, but okay. he'll have to get used to it as my mom and dad will be heading back to work soon.

27th-spent the whole day working at the pharmacy. worked with my old boss. it wasn't too busy which was good, as i had forgotten how to do some of the stuff!

today i'm working the evening shift with the PHARMACIST FROM HELL...she is so DAMN slow she drives me nuts as well as the customers. this blog isn't big enough to contain all my rants and raves about her, but suffice it to say, I HATE WORKING WITH HER.

re: shooting in toronto: it makes me sad that it takes the death of a 15-year-old to galvanize the city to action. and i wonder if there will be any concrete action taken, as they (police, public, media, etc.) have been saying the same things since this summer, when the onslaught of shootings began. i feel sad at the loss of toronto's innocence.

CET

whateva!

yeah, yeah, yeah, so i tried a piece of chili's kibble as well, big deal. it was alot tastier than the chicken strip.

ENOUGH people have emailed me telling me that they want to try their pet's kibble too, so poo poo to you!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

CET

kibble

hmmm, there's nothing much to write about if it isn't about my puppy, at least not in the last few days. canuckian and i went out on wednesday - the first time we've been out of the house since we got chili on sunday - for dinner with a friend. we went christmas shopping afterwards but bought things for ourselves! today we had lunch with another friend followed by more shopping, and again it was for ourselves or for chili. he ABSOLUTELY LOVES to chew; i found him some rawhide chews in the shape of slippers! very cute. he barked at it when he first saw it but now loves gnawing on the thing.

we're also try to distance ourselves from him, so that he gets used to being alone some of the time. because everyone's at home for the holidays he has been quite spoiled with the constant company. he whines alot when we're not there and like a child crying, your first instinct is to go to it (though with some children my instinct is to run away!), but we have to resist the urge and let him be alone for a while.

anyhoo, this christmas is pretty low-key; my parents might be having mah jong activities at the house tomorrow, but canuckian and i don't really have any plans. just waiting to open presents i guess!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! may you all have a wonderful time with your friends and loved ones; all the best for 2006!

CET

chicken strips

holy, it's only his fourth day at home with us and chili's already learned how to climb up the stairs! he's still a little frightened to climb down though. he's also figured out how to get past the gate blocking his "puppy-proof" area from the rest of the basement. what a smart puppy! he really is growing day by day.

we gave him a bath today and he looked so funny; with his fur all wet and pressed against his body, he looked like a white, water-drenched, over-sized rat. definitely not as bad as a chihuahua though (is that how you spell it?). he was really scared while having his bath, but he looked so cute and fluffy after. my mom clipped his toenails too.

so, we have these strips of dried chicken that we give him as a treat if he's done something good, liking pooing on the paper instead of the carpet; it looks like beef/turkey jerky and smells really good...i couldn't help myself and tried a little bit. it tasted really bland unless you bit into it, and while a little bit of flavour emerged, overall the taste was disappointing. so if you've always wondered what chicken strip dog treats taste like, now you know.

yeah, yeah, yeah, don't tell me you've never been curious as to what dog food tastes like...

CET

i'm a crazy dog lady

okay, so i don't want to post entry after entry on nothing but chili, because that would make me a crazy dog lady - thank god my repulsion of dog clothes keeps me from going over the crazy-dog-lady edge. i started this blog to keep in touch with my friends and family, letting them know what i get up to while in london - this, i promise, will not turn into an "all about chili" blog space. i'm sure there's enough of those on the internet. having said that though...

my days are consumed with looking after this dog! i think it's because canuckian and i know we only have a limited time with him (as a puppy) until we have to fly back to our respective destinations; we are thus making the most of every waking moment we have with him. as parents say about their kids, "they grow up so fast!", so i know that when i see chili again in june he'll be a completely different dog then when i left him. we have gone crazy with the camera, taking pictures of him left, right and centre, as we want to capture his funny ways while he's still little. too bad my family has yet to enter the 21st century by purchasing a digital camera, but i'm sure that will happen eventually.

funny moment: today was the first time we let him into the kitchen/front hall. there was a basket on the floor with a huge head of cabbage in it - chili was suspicious of the cabbage (as it was bigger than he is!), and proceeded to bark at it with all the fury his little body could muster. cracked me up, a dog barking at cabbage. he also barked at his own reflection in the tv cabinet door, and proceeded to charge at his own image, only to knock his face into the door. classic.

i love my puppy!

CET

a pinch of chili...

that's our chili!!! the picture was taken at the breeder's place when chili was eight weeks' old. he was born october 18th, and is a west highland white terrier, also known as a westie.

today chili:

a) bit my hand until it bled (BAD CHILI, BAD CHILI!!!)
b) didn't pee on the newspaper and i was fortunate enough to step on it
c) took a nap in my lap

canuckian and i are looking after him in shifts. you know you love someone when they bite you and pee where they aren't suppose to and you're okay with that.

he went a little crazy at one point, digging around in his bed and running around haphazardly. i'm glad i haven't been around when he's pooed.

CET

WE GOT OUR PUPPY!!!

we came home from ferris' horse farm today in time for the arrival of our new puppy...named CHILI!!! yup, he is one hot dog, he he he...oh my goodness, my mom was cradling him in her arms, wrapped in a red fleece blanket...a picture of pure cuteness. we placed him in his new "puppy-proof" area and he was timid at first, but not long after he was playing with us and frolicking about.

my mom taught him how to pee and poo in his little "bathroom corner", and soon enough he was doing it on his own, without any prompting! pretty damn good for his first day.

he had SOOO many visitors too, a couple of my mom's friends and their husbands, not to mention their sons and daughters and even the daughter's fiance! my friends came to visit as well, mr. bing and flo, and we got caught up on each other's lives while chili was running about. AND they all came bearing gifts! chili already has new toys, his first christmas card and a christmas treat. man, i'm already talking like a crazy dog lady. at least I won't be the one to dress him up in stupid clothes, that's my mom's job.

he took a couple of naps because he was all played out; my mom is now sleeping beside him downstairs, as it's his first night away from his mom and siblings.

mr. bing took lots of pics with her digital camera - as soon as she sends them to me i'll post them up!

it's funny how much i love him already.

CET

dim sum eat thai

another stellar food day. had dim sum with my dad and canuckian - two dollars per dish before 11:30am, SWEET! we had about 14 dishes between the three of us, oh yeah baby. har gow, siu mai, bbq pork bun, egg tarts, congee, mmm...all my regular favourites and then some. i love being such a glutton with my family.

in the afternoon canuckian met up with a contact at the art gallery of ontario for coffee, so while she was doing that i spent my time at the henry moore sculpture gallery (see picture above). they had those blank cards where you can do a little sketch or doodle, so i exercised my long-lost artistic ability and tried my hand at sketching one of the sculptures, "two piece reclining figure no. 9". i don't think i did too badly, the shading might've been a little bit off, but i think i did pretty good for someone who hasn't sketched in years. at the bottom of the card you can write a little about yourself and where you're from - i signed off "canuckian's evil twin." i wonder if anyone will make the connection?

the evening was spent at salad king (thai restaurant) eating garlic shrimp, yummy. i always leave full and happy from that place. then it was to my cousin's condo for some "hangin' out" quality time. my cousin, "mac boy" and his fiancee are heading to london for a week's vacation this sunday, so i wrote down all the places they could go for some cheap eats! we were going to go see "king kong" tonight, but for reasons i won't get into here, i am back home instead, blogging before going to bed.

tomorrow i'm off to my friend ferris' horse farm for a "bake n' booze" fest, where we literally eat desserts and make cocktails. it's like betty crocker meets betty ford, nice. bring on the chocolate chip cookies and chocolate martini!

have a good weekend everybody!

CET

the weather outside is frightful...

...and the fire's so delightful,
there's simply no place to go,
let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!!!

i don't know if i got the lyrics right, but you know what i mean.

holy white christmas batman, there's snow, and tons of it! canuckian and i just came from shovelling our driveway. thank god my dad bought a snowblower during the summer (yes, you can get snowblowers in canada during the summer), as there was alot of the white stuff and it was really heavy and thick, not the light, fluffy kind. this type of snow is PERFECT for building a snowman. i want to get my snowsuit on and roll around in it. tomorrow's activity perhaps...

it's so nice to have such a distinct season, even if it wreaks havoc on traffic and you break your back shovelling the stuff. a white christmas, ahhh...

CET

walmart wackiness

ahhh, holidays are all about waking up when you want, eating when you want, and generally being an enormous sloth for a few weeks. so isn't it weird that i've been getting up early (and by that i mean before ten, because any time before ten IS early), and have been reduced to scrounging around the house for food, as our house is not properly stocked? what the heck?

because i've been waking up early, i like to go to canuckian's room and jump on her until she wakes up. she was quite the moody cow today so i've given her a new nickname - canuckian MC (moody cow), or canuckian DMC (definitely moody cow). i love how creativity is sparked at the most unlikely of times. no, that's not true, i'm ALWAYS creative when it comes to dissing my sister.

we're off to walmart in a little while to do some chocolate shopping and puppy toy shopping, not to mention the post office to mail out the gazillion cards canuckian and i spent all last night writing out. i know walmart is evil, but where else can you get ten boxes of clodhoppers for cheap?

my mom and dad should be picking up our new puppy on sunday, when there's a "predicted" break in the weather. we're all bracing ourselves for a snowstorm that should be hitting us sometime tonight. isn't there something so immediate in living in a country where you can die from just being outside? makes you feel alive! :)

time to wake my dad up from his nap.

CET

no puppy today :(

so i wake up at 7:15am, as we want to leave the house by around 8 for the three-hour drive to kingston. my mom comes out of the bathroom in her work clothes. i'm thinking "why is she dressed so nice to pick up a dog?" when she tells me we're not going because of all the snowfall last night. i run to the window and look outside, and sure enough EVERYTHING is covered in a few inches of snow. DAMMIT!

don't get me wrong, i love snow, but it just figures it would fall (and in large quantities) on the day we want to get our new puppy. so now we'll have to wait until the snow clears and it's safe enough for driving. if we owned a pickup truck or a SUV we'd be happily on our way right about now but alas, no.

my dad said we should have the dog couriered to us today (he works for a courier company). i thought that was pretty funny.

i guess it's back to bed for a bit more sleep, then perhaps i'll pop into the pharmacy today (i used to work there) to say hi to my old colleagues and speak to the RX manager, she might have a few days for me lined up.

i want my puppy NOW!!!

CET

birthday and puppy!!!

today is my birthday - canuckian too, of course. a BIG thank you to everyone who called and emailed birthday wishes today!!!

there were no outbreaks of wrinkles of my face today, thank goodness! when i turned 26 i SWEAR fat globules (i.e. "love handles") appeared around my waist overnight! i am not even kidding...

didn't do too much today, had lunch with canuckian, my dad and grandma, then drove to canadian tire to buy fuses for the fuse box. exciting, i know. my grandma got her hair done (i.e. old lady perm) at this salon across from the vegetarian restaurant we ALWAYS go to. the salon owner had a his pet bunny hopping around the salon - a big bunny, all velvety and black - my dad told me not to touch it for fear of AVIAN flu...i'm like "hi, avian flu is found in BIRDS" and he's like "yeah, but still."

tonight we had all-you-can-eat sushi for dinner. mmm mmm good. it's practically a ritual: as soon as we walk in my dad orders 20 to 30 pieces of salmon sashimi - remember here that we haven't even made it to the table and sat down yet - when it comes, we eat it really, really fast, even though we keep reminding ourselves to slow down and pace so that we can fit more food in. then it's more sashimi, maki, hand rolls, tempura, uni, yakitori until we're absolutely stuffed. good times.

did i tell you my family's getting a puppy??? we're picking him up tomorrow, it's a west highland white terrier!!! i am beyond excited, it'll be our first puppy ever. after dinner we went around to the pet place to buy a bed, toys and a leash. my dad wanted one of those poop-and-scoop things where you don't have to touch the poo at all. they were SOOO expensive! i didn't think it was worth it at all when you can just use your hand (with a bag over it of course). the breeder sent us a pic via email, it was like getting a sonogram of your first child - well, not like i know what that's like, but you know what i mean - anyhoo, i will let you know how the pick-up goes. he is just SOOO adorable...

CET

the twins have landed

canuckian and i are home now, woohoo!!! our flights arrived within an hour of each other, canuckian at terminal 2 and i at terminal 1. it was a happy reunion with the family - lots of hugs and kisses - oh, and a box of tim hortons donuts waiting for us in the car. sweet, joyous bliss. then it was off for home, where my grandma, aunt and cousins were waiting for us. another happy reunion, followed by dinner of chinese bbq pork, chicken and all things YUMMY. this month home will be a food feast to remember.

had dinner tonight with friend e (oh, her new nickname on my blog will be "e-mail" - long story, perhaps i'll fill you in later, but for now, "e-mail" it is, hehehe...) and her family and friends. ladyinthestreet was there (i finally figured out who she is, thanks to my sis), as well as our friend "melroy". we had a feast to delight the senses; lobster, scallops, squid, shrimp, pork, chicken, fish, etc., and for dessert we had a fried treat in the shape of a rabbit! everything was SOOO good! oh, i almost forgot to mention the eel we had, fried and steamed, mmm...MANY THANKS to e-mail's family for hosting and treating us! that was VERY kind of them.

last thing to note: it's minus 15 degrees here tonight, not including the wind chill. HOLY CRAP, i had forgotten how FRICKIN' FREEZING it gets here! i think being away from canada has caused me to have an idealized version in my head of what winter in canada is like. i imagine snowy days with bright sunshine, the air fresh and crisp, and while all of this is true, my brain conveniently forgot the holy-jesus-it's-so-cold-my-nose-is-going-to-fall-off part.

tomorrow is my birthday! eek. i don't want to talk about my age at the moment, all i'm looking forward to is the all-you-can-eat sushi dinner, and dairy queen ice cream cake that's waiting for me in the freezer. BRING IT ON.

CET

last day of term!!!

woohoo, today's the last day of class! can you believe it? it's gone by so quickly (of which i'm actually rather glad). i still have a tutorial and a three-hour chem lab to get through, but it's just nice knowing that in 48 hours time i'll be on the plane back to toronto.

i'm wearing my new white top and earrings that g gave me for my birthday, and am feeling tres cool. it's a boatneck top with a funky silver design on the front. i love how she captured my style so well! anyhoo, enough about that.

thank you to everyone for your support! you're right styxxx, the tutorial agency doesn't DESERVE me - they can stick it! i will go home to re-energize myself and then come back to tackle the new year head on!

i'm having dinner tonight with the evil hypnotist and t, should be nice. hopefully evil hypnotist will be wearing his fedora, so i can try that trick again where you roll the hat up your arm until it lands on your head. some guy was doing that at the boat party and i want to practice.

love you all; for those in t.o., see you soon!

CET
p.s. the skull in the creek has been removed, i wonder by whom?

i am so bummed...

i received an email today from a tutorial agency that i applied to. t is working for them, tutoring students in german, and makes £22 an hour! you can only imagine how much that money would help me. anyhoo, so basically the email says:

Dear Applicant,
Unfortunately your application to become a tutor with the ***** Tutorial Agency has been unsuccessful. Due to the high volumes of applications to our agency we are unable to give individual responses to all applicants.

talk about generic and heartless. what the f do i do now? waterstone's doesn't want me, the tutorial agency doesn't want me - i can't find a job in this city to save my life! it leaves me more worried about money (like i need to worry about money even more) and more frustrated. F*** F*** F***!!!

CET

brick lane and tapas

model update: chatted with model boy yesterday in the computer room, turns out he's been modelling for eight years now, and was "discovered" by a modelling agency. he also lives a couple of tube stops down from me, so we're practically neighbours!

went to brick lane to do some xmas shopping yesterday. brick lane is known for its curry houses, but past the curry houses, further down the street, you'll find some really great clothes shopping! there's a store called laden showrooms that has all the clothes you'd normally find at the markets, all in one place - no need to fight the scores of people normally crammed into the market on a sunday afternoon! there's also some pretty cool vintage clothes shops, and a little alleyway called the "sunday (up) market" with some clothes stores as well. i think my canuckian will be VERY happy!

yesterday's "flatmate dinner" went surprisingly well. we went to the tapas bar around the corner and it was really good; the waitress served us an apple liqueur and a hazelnut one after dinner and dessert, complimentary (did i spell that right?) of the restaurant - i think it's because they know we're their neighbours! the conversation flowed well and it was a nice evening. when we got home i sat them down and gave them their xmas presents (see, i am SO nice) - "angels and demons" by dan brown for flatmate s, and a whole bunch of organic chocolate for flatmate j.

it's weird because now i feel a bit bad for slagging them on my blog (well, just a little), but it's just that their personalities are so inconsistent, i never know where i stand with them at any given moment!

CET

supermodel in our midst

so quite by chance today i found out one of the male students in my class is a MODEL!!!

one of the girls bought this month's glamour magazine and in it is a ten page spread of "model boy!" i had just come out of the bathroom and the girl thrusts the magazine in my face. i look at the picture thinking "so what?" when the realization of what i'm looking at dawns on me. so of course i scream and grab the magazine from her, flipping through the pages.

it's so strange to see someone in a completely different light. he is cute in person though a little rough around the edges; on a whole he just looks so NORMAL. he's really tall and lanky and has shaggy, droopy brown hair (it's a little long). he comes into the common room and by this time the magazine has made its way around to every first year student in the room. i think he seemed a little embarrassed by our reaction but hey, that's what you get when you don't tell anyone you're a MODEL! he told me he did the shoot earlier this year and that he's been modelling for a while. i think it's great, as i'm sure it must help with the bills.

my flatmates and i are having a little christmas dinner together tonight, just the three of us. flatmate s suggested it. i must admit i was a little shocked and thoroughly confused when i received her text message; most of the time they are so aloof and antisocial with me, not to mention flatmate j's various neuroses, and now we're suppose to eat together like a happy flatmate family? i just don't understand it. never in my life have two people been more confusing or as hard to figure out.

i'm off to do a little more xmas shopping today, just a few more items to buy. save for a couple of morning classes each day, i'm pretty much free until my full day on friday. ahhh, the life of a student; it's great except for the dirt poor part.

CET

full weekend

sorry folks, it's a full-on 9-to-5 day today, so before i head to my biochem tutorial, here is a point-form rundown on my weekend activities:

friday:

- birthday dinner at t's place; he made roast lemon chicken with roasted veggies, yum
- he gave me a BIG box of chocolates; the evil hypnotist gave me a lava lamp (cool)
- g was there, this was her first time meeting t; verdict? "he's really cute and can cook too"

saturday:

- went xmas shopping with t's sister, then saw the film, "keeping mum", starring rowan atkinson and kristen scott thomas; verdict? "dark, funny and cute, i liked it"

sunday:

- lunch and market shopping at spitalfields with "american e", the girl who's working in registry in the job that i did when i used to live here
- bought some cool pressies for g (as she's my secret santa); not to toot my own horn but i consider myself a pretty good gift-giver!
- came home, wrapped pressies like a mofo, then went to dinner for the secret santa exchange
- kiwigirl got me, i got g, and g got kiwigirl; all the pressies were AWESOME!!! i am so happy with my gifts and i'm sure they're happy with theirs
- the food: smoked salmon fillet with olive crushed potatoes, followed by a pear and peach crumble with custard = tummy heaven

gotta go! only a week until i'm home!

CET

the characters in my play

i received a letter last week from a friend back home in t.o., let's call her the "business woman" - oh, and if you read this "business woman", and want a better nickname, then let me know!

in her letter she said it was hard trying to keep track of all the people i mention in my blog, because more often than not i just use the first letter of their first name, and do not give them a proper nickname.

so here, in no particular order, are the people that i've mentioned in my blog (as far as i can remember). you can suggest a nickname for the people that only have an initial, but i hope listing all the "characters" clears up some confusion.

flatmate j - self-explanatory
flatmate s - self-explanatory too

kl, or kiwigirl

"g" - a friend i met through kiwigirl, whom she met through her flatmate

"t" (we all know this is my ex, right?)

ms. journalist
evil hypnotist

classmate t - again, pretty self-explanatory

"j" - a friend i've known since grade 7; she's living in london as well at the moment

that's all i can think of so far. let me know if i've missed anyone. i was going to assign a nickname to those who still have just an initial, but i think that'll just add to the confusion so i'm sticking with their initial, too bad!

in other news, t's throwing me a little birthday dinner party tonight at his flat. that is SOOO sweet of him. it'll be nice.

the girl at the computer next to me was looking at weird diseases on the internet and showed me a picture of a woman who had larvae growing in her boob, over her nipple. can we say GROSS??? i think i'm scarred now from looking at the image. i don't even want to describe it, i think your own imaginations will be sufficient.

CET

row da boat

hey party people,

so my school threw a christmas boat party yesterday. alot of people that i know from first year came along, though i guess most of the people on the boat were upper years.

i only had two classes yesterday, so my classmate T and i had an english breakfast at her local greasy spoon, then hung out and got ready at her flat. i was pretty stupid because i a) forgot my party ticket at home and b) brought my hair straightener (north american plug) but forgot the converter. it was fun though getting ready for the party together. neither of us are "girly girls" normally but sometimes it's nice to be that once in a while.

i showed T my blog, it was the first time she'd seen it. i told her i mentioned in my blog how i find her boyfriend EXTREMELY hot, and that i hope she didn't mind i wrote that. :)

the party itself wasn't too bad. after a shaky start music-wise, the dj put on some pretty good R&B so my bad self got down and boogied. maybe it was the cappuccino i had just before boarding, but man, did i feel like the energizer bunny or what? i felt like i could've danced forever. one of the student union's social reps tried djing and he did a shite job of it. couldn't mix songs to save his life. and because the majority of the school is made up of indian people, he played tune after tune of nothing but bangra music; now, i don't mind bangra at all, but not THAT much, plus after a while it felt like the music was catering to just one kind of taste. anyhoo, i told him to play something else and after a while he did.

the boat had to be back at the dock by 11:30pm, and we were on the guest list for the ministry of sound, but i was staying over at T's place so i didn't go. we got a curry takeaway and after they went to bed i stayed up watching tv for a while before going to bed myself. i watched an ultra-old-school episode of "ER".

anyhoo, that's about it. pretty good night; i'm glad i got to shake my booty.

CET

john cusack and gay men

so i spent friday night watching "grosse pointe blank" on tv. god i love that film. god i love john cusack. i don't know what it is about him but he is so damn hot and so many women love him. i think every woman (or at least alot of them) want their man to have a little bit of john's wit and charm - i know i do!

saturday i went to kiwigirl's flatmate's boyfriend's house party. he lives in a tiny but GORGEOUS flat smack dab in the middle of covent garden. talk about prime real estate. sushi and dim sum were the nibblies, my favourite siu mai and bbq pork bun, mmm... all the men at the party were gay (except one guy who looked like hugh grant apparently (i don't remember), but he was with - who else - his girlfriend). i had some great conversations with some of the men; all the single, heterosexual ladies at the party (of which there were four) agreed that why can't straight guys be more like gay men? is that not the lament of the 21st century?

i think gay men have the best of both worlds. they are more in tune with the female sensibility and yet retain much of their masculinity (except for drag queens i guess?), and it's a beautiful masculinity at that! alas.

my male friends, gay or straight, leave a comment here for the ladies letting us know why this is so?

CET

quickie

sorry, have lab in 45 minutes and i still have to pay tuition, have lunch and finish up my lab report! yes i am bad.

will write more tomorrow!

hope everyone had a good weekend.

CET

friday ho-hum

i have twenty minutes before my three-hour chemistry lab on a friday, oh joy!

i'm tired. i don't know if it's a) not enough sleep or b) i'm not eating enough fruits and veggies. does that have anything to do with it? not getting all the necessary vitamins i suppose. i was proud of myself today though, i packed a really healthy lunch! bagel with mustard and salami on one half and pate on the other half; two satsuma oranges and a bag of walnuts! i think that's the healthiest lunch i've eaten since i've arrived in the uk.

having said that though, i'm about to have a twix before i go to lab, hehehe...

have a good weekend everyone!

CET

woman in black

holy crap, the play i went to see last night was SCARY! it's called "woman in black" and it's about, what else, but a woman in black. i don't want to give too much away other than the woman in black is a ghost; her ghastly white face kept popping up on stage, making people scream, and there's this one scene where she's rocking in a rocking chair that freaks the poo poo out of you. there were about thirteen of us at the play, and afterwards we went to the pub for a drink or two to calm our nerves.

scary films/plays/books stay in my mind for a while. my imagination always gets the better of me, so when i went to sleep last night i kept thinking of her ghostly pale face and of her rocking in the chair. i know i shouldn't think of it obviously, but it's like my mind can't escape it, like i want to scare myself. a good analogy would be a roller coaster ride; it scares the heck out of people but they keep going back for more. that's like my mind and scary movies.

when i have nightmares they are pretty bad. bad in the gory sense of bad. i have this one recurring dream (once every five years or so) of a double murder...i won't go into the specifics but it's pretty damn frightening! it's kind of sick what your mind is capable of imagining. take the creators of "saw" and "saw two" - now THAT is twisted.

i didn't look in the creek today to see if the skull was still there...

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random thoughts and observations

there's a creek intersecting the street that i walk down everyday to catch the bus...someone threw a plastic halloween skull into the creek, and half of it is poking out of the water...quite the funny-yet-slightly-creepy sight whenever i walk by now. i wonder who, if anyone, is going to fish it out?

i've been craving a full-on english breakfast since last night, when i couldn't decide between salmon fishcakes or an english breakfast at the pub...took the tube to the S&M Cafe near liverpool street station today, just to get my breakfast. yes, i was a naughty girl :) by the way, S&M means sausages and mash, you dirty-minded people!

it came with "black pudding", which for those of you who don't know, is basically cooked pig's blood shaped into sausages or something...anyhoo, i did eat half of it and it's not too bad, but i kept thinking of what it actually was while i was eating it, hence i didn't finish the other half. i shouldn't be so squeamish considering i eat meat but still, the thought of eating caked blood kind of made me want to retch.

i wandered around spitalfields market and petticoat lane market afterwards - both great markets, i wish t.o. had more markets - then headed to tottenham court road for more wandering and shopping. kiwigirl, g and i are doing secret santa, and i bought two pressies today! and yes kiwigirl, with only three people doing secret santa it isn't hard to figure out who has who...damn you, because i figured it out even though i didn't want to!

i'm going to see a musical tonight, "woman in black", as part of a friend's birthday celebrations. should be interesting.

i feel the need to put my feet up and have a cup of hot cocoa, i did alot of walking today.

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busy but not really

it's funny how i have a gazillion little things to do, and plenty of time to do them (technically), but i don't get anything done!

had a run-in with another teacher yesterday, the infamous "dr. growler". i swear, he cultivates the mean bastard persona like a farmer cultivates corn. what a fucker. he must have been bullied as a kid, and he's making up for it now as an adult. that's what classmate t says, to quote, "he doesn't have much going for him other than his brains." and you know someone's really getting on your nerves when you daydream about telling them off, as i do now with him.

had my academic tutor meeting with prof. b. his handsome-ness is fading a bit. he is such a busy guy, i think he's being run ragged and it shows. had a nice tie on though.

oh, i've had this in my head for a while and have been meaning to get it out: i was on the bus one evening and passed by a hair salon called "Mo Betta Cutz". nice. that's for my Skinnes.

meeting kiwigirl today for dinner and a long-overdue catch-up. can't wait.

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la-dee-da

this weekend has been sort of blah, but a good kind of blah where you can relax for once and not have to "go go go" all the time, you know what i mean? socially, london rocks the casbah, but sometimes you just need a break!

met up with ms. journalist and frenchman on saturday; we were to go skating at the rink they set up at the natural history museum. we get there only to find that they're charging 10 pounds for an hour's worth of skating, and that you have to pre-book and all the tickets were sold out that day. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??? TEN BLOODY POUNDS!!! what a rip off, and the sad part is that most (if not all) the rinks in london are that expensive. oh how i miss the free ice skating back home!

with skating shot to hell, we went to, of all places, the science museum. this was where i worked back in 2002/2003; it was surreal going back there to say the least, like walking back in time. ran into a couple of people i used to know, one of them a manager. thank god i didn't run into the one i REALLY REALLY hated, good old squerge. it's weird going back to a place that held such fond memories for me, but at the same time such bad ones.

ms. journalist had to go, so frenchman and i had coffee and cake at a cafe nearby. t joined us and then it was just t and i for dinner at the pizza express joint by my old flat in earl's court (ahhh, memories!). then it was home for me, where i watched the country music awards on tv (don't ask); i quite enjoyed texting evil hypnotist while the show was on - his girlfriend LOVES country and we were taking the piss out of all the artists, good times.

i might see the wallace and gromit film today, been meaning to see it again since the t.o. film festival. oh, and can i just say how excited i am that i'll be coming home to t.o. shortly?! only three weeks to go!

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today is not a good day...

- people being far too rude than is EVER necessary, especially on a friday morning (i mean, when i say "excuse me" three times can you NOT MOVE YOUR BIG ASS OVER???)
- still waiting for my loan cheque to come through into my account (i.e. I HATE IEFC AND NATWEST)...frustrated to the point of tears
- the stupid keys on this damn keyboard not working, so that in order to type a "b" i have to press it down until my thumb hurts
- making friends with people and inviting them out to stuff, only they don't return the favour
- certain people who "horde" their friends

i am going home to eat and sleep this morning away; hopefully this evening will be better. am meeting the evil hypnotist for a late dinner and perhaps a movie so that's something to look forward to.

argh.

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it was a good day...

yesterday was busy. attended one (of two) lecture, and afterwards went to seven kings high school with Mrs. S from registry; they were running a small, universities fair for the kids in that area's enriched science/math program. afterwards they had a teacher from UCL who performed a chemistry show. i love chemistry shows. he had various balloons filled with either helium, hydrogen, or hydrogen + various salts. he held a match to each of them and they exploded with a huge bang, along with a flash of light in various colours, depending on what gas and what salt was in the balloon. it's funny how i knew what was coming (i.e. the bang), and yet still jumped when the balloon exploded.

afterwards i headed back to SOP, as someone i knew had her PhD viva (i.e. oral defense), and passed with flying colours. we headed to the bar to celebrate, then e and i went elsewhere for a cheap pizza and good conversation.

on tuesday night i had dinner with my mom's first cousin and her son down at new cross gate. my second cousin is an EXCELLENT cook, and it was great having a homemade chinese meal again, ahhh...she even gave me food that she cooked in advance and froze, so that i could take it back to the flat and defrost it and eat it whenever i want. two tupperwares full of lamb curry, and her own handmade fish balls. i am so lucky.

oops, they're closing the lab!

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p.s. sillyhead: thanks for all your comments...it took me a while to figure out who you are, but i know now...an email will be with you shortly! i'm glad you're reading my blog. say hi to ms. sillyhead for me.
p.p.s. lady in the street: i know this is terrible, but i still can't figure out who you are! i have one idea based on your location, no, i have two ideas, but can you email me letting me know? you have my email address, right? thanks for linking me on your blog, i will do the same.

interview and weekend...

the interview went really well i think. not to toot my own horn, but after going through countless interviews at waterpoo and beyond, i think it's fair to say i have my interview skills down to a fine art. they asked typical HR questions, like "describe a situation where you used your teamwork skills to produce a positive result. what was your contribution?" blah, blah, blah. there were two women interviewing me and the whole thing lasted about an hour. it's a simple bookseller's job (i.e. not rocket science), but i won't know until next week because they're interviewing gazillions of people (why? who knows). i think i did the best that i could do, so here's hoping!

the weekend: went to greenwich on saturday. had my GORGEOUS pies at goddard's pie house by the cutty sark (the cutty sark's a famous ship); chicken and mushroom pie with mash and gravy for lunch, then rhubarb crumble with custard for afternoon snack. heaven in a bowl. shopped around greenwich market (always some good buys), then went to the queen's house - no, not buckingham palace, it's actually called the queen's house - the great hall is a perfect cube. appealed to the geek in me.

sunday i had dim sum with my classmate t and her long-term boyfriend "a" (HOLY CRAP HE IS HOT! don't even get me started on describing his hotness), along with "e", the registry assistant (i.e. the job i used to do when i was working here). hearing the sounds and smelling the smells of a busy chinese restaurant felt like home. the food wasn't bad either. afterwards i went to Mass with t and a (hahaha, "t and a") - yes, Mass, as in Catholic Mass - i figured if i could go to a hare krishna temple with one friend, why not Mass with another? expanding my religious knowledge base if you will. the mass was delivered in cantonese too. while sitting in the pew i kept thinking of the simpsons attending church; i thought to myself "now i know what homer feels like."

"t and a" and Mass in one sentence, nice.

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interview...eek!

just a quickie, am off to my interview at 4pm - it's with waterstones bookstore (like our indigo/chapters) - have i told you this already?

should be researching about the company but instead am blogging. oh well.

if i get the job i'll be working weekends in the medical section of the bookstore. wish me luck!

eek, i'm a little nervous.

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good friends and moody bitches

had g over for dinner last night. made a YUMMY chick pea curry (well, with pork too - i know you're not suppose to put pork in it but the meat was defrosting and i wanted to eat it so anyhoo, the curry wasn't completely "kosher") if i do say so myself! we looked at pictures, gossiped and gossiped, and finished a whole bottle of wine. it was such a lovely evening in.

flatmate j came home expecting the flat to be empty (as i made last minute changes to my plans with g by inviting her over instead of going out). flatmate s was out until late, and he thought he had the whole flat to himself. anyhoo, he goes out again for an hour to the internet cafe, then comes home to make dinner for himself. he goes off on some weird-ass tangent about the tea towels being "soaking wet" whenever i use them - i mean excuse me? what the hell are tea towels used for if you don't dry your hands/dishes on them, thereby getting them wet? - i'm thinking "what the fuck has he been smoking to make him so paranoid over fucking tea towels?"

when g leaves i confront him and ask if something is wrong. basically he tells me that he was a bit "thrown" when he came home and found me there, as he was looking forward to some "me time" with himself. then he says he's the type of person that needs to be forwarned about people coming so that he can "prepare" himself. i'm like "prepare for what?" and he says it's his tendency to play the jester whenever he meets people. so i say "well then why can't you just be yourself?" as i secretly think to myself that his jester role is far more annoying than his normal self, and basically he just can't.

conclusion: i live with weirdos.

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awkward silence

it's starting to frustrate me how NO ONE in my tutor group EXCEPT ME speaks up when my lovely prof. b asks us a question. he asks us about everything; how school's going, what we think of the course, professors, likes, dislikes, how life outside of school is, pretty much everything under the sun. his questions are always met with an awkward silence, like it's so weird to actually speak up and have something to say. it drives me insane. these tutor meetings have the potential to be so helpful and productive and they're not, because no one shares anything except me. i don't want to monopolize the conversation but i invariably do. i even ask for the others' opinions and they just look at me like "why are you picking on me, i have nothing to say". how can someone have nothing to say? no opinion or feeling on anything, EVER??? and the other students in my tutor group all have first degrees like me, are all considered "mature" students, and yet they still aren't able to offer anything to a round-table discussion. prof. b isn't even intimidating, so they can't use that as an excuse. poo.

had two classes and i'm done for the day. time to go home and, what else, EAT!

CET

busy busy

sorry about not posting yesterday, had biochem lab til 5 and then was tutoring a friend until 6.

today's the first day in two/three weeks where i haven't been coughing like a mofo, yay!

oh, and congratulations to MD on his sister's new baby girl! i did get your email but had no time to reply yesterday (or today), but have time to congratulate you (and her) on my blog. please send them my best.

okay, three minutes until i meet my hunky academic tutor, mmm...

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exhale

i know you're all dying to know what my plan was regarding t, right? well, at least mr. bing was dying to know. this is for you mr. napoleon bing!

i met up with t for a coffee on sunday afternoon...i don't want to go into too much detail, as posts regarding romance end up becoming epic novels, but suffice it to say that we had much to talk about and came to many realizations about our relationship in the past, and where we're headed in the future - not as a couple, but as individual people. so no, we're not back together, but we're each in a much happier place emotionally than we were these past few weeks, ever since the "king's cross incident". that's not to say it might not happen for us in the future, but we realize that this time apart is and will be beneficial to us both. and it's not like we're expecting or hoping it will happen in the future, as that would put too much pressure on the both of us; we're just taking it one day at a time. like my mom says, you don't know what your future will be like until it happens, so you'll just have to wait and see what comes naturally.

yes i know this post sounds pretty cryptic, but i'm sure i'll fill you in on all the details when i see you all (hopefully) this christmas!

CET

popstarz

so last night i went with my two flatmates, s and j, and s's friend, let's call him mango, to Popstarz Night at La Scala near king's cross; it was a fundraiser in memory of a prominent figure in the gay community, with all proceeds going to cancer research uk. imagine a huge labyrinth of a club, with the main stage playing rock music and other rooms with other various types of music. tons and tons of people, a mix of all sexualities, genders, cultures, etc., everything under the sun!

we had to wait a bit to get into the club, and j was being a moody bitch because he wanted to go to bed instead of going to a club. he went because s wanted to go. remember they are bf and gf here. anyhoo, we're dancing on the main stage and j's mood just gets worse and worse, talk about a party pooper! sulking like nobody's business. s ignores it and instead sexy dances with another guy, nice. right in front of your boyfriend. mango and i are trying our best to ignore the drama when s abruptly leaves to go to another music room with the other guy! j quickly tells me "he's off", and goes home by himself. oh boy. mango and i end up upstairs in the room where s and boy are, as the music there was WAY better (justin timberlake AND C+C music factory, oh yeah, bring it on). mango and i are shaking our respective booties the way they're meant to be shaken, having a really great time. s takes off looking for us (apparently she was sexy dancing with boy so intensely she didn't see mango and i) and long story short, finds us an hour and a half later ready to go home. boo. too bad, it was a night where i could've stayed up dancing until dawn.

so s and i go home and j's still up and "wants to talk" to s. they go into his room but it's not like i can't hear anything. lordy. that's what sucks about living with a couple, having to put up with their drama. after watching an episode of the LOVEBOAT (exciting and new, come aboard, we're expecting you!), i went to bed rather than listen to them arguing.

oh, new term learned for the day: fruit fly - girls who hang out with gay guys. i know you might think "we'll that's what a fag hag is," but apparently (according to mango), fag hags are ugly, no social life, loserish women who constantly hang out with gay men (or just one in particular) because they don't have anyone else to hang out with, while fruit flies are better and cooler than that. and who says i'm not in london for an education?

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i can see (somewhat) clearly now...

so after an in-depth discussion with kiwigirl and g last night and a not-so-in-depth discussion with my flatmate j, i have a clearer idea now of what i want and what i need to do regarding t. i won't divulge anything at this point, but i'll let you know the outcome when it happens! it's just nice to finally not feel like i'm in limbo anymore...

must make this quick as i have my chemistry lab in 15 minutes. we're playing with salicylic acid today, ooo...

have a great weekend!
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blah

had a class today where we met a patient; she told us about her medical history and we asked her questions. the prof in charge was a lady from the states; she had a thick, southern accent and (this will sound weird) it was a refreshing change from all the british accents! it's funny how i'm so used to british accents that anything different perks my ears, even the nasal drawl of a southern accent.

i asked alot of questions as the rest of the class sat there quiet - i just don't understand how people here are so reserved and not willing to speak up! even in my academic tutor meetings i'm always the one to talk, no one will pipe up with anything except me. what is up with that? i don't want to dominate the conversation, but it's hard not to when no one will say anything except you. this may make me look like a keener in class, but i don't care.

i'm having dinner with kiwigirl and g tonight, can't wait for that. another intensive girl chat session, unless kiwigirl's boy flatmate and his boyfriend are thrown into the mix. but then you get the male perspective, and whether it's a gay or straight perspective it's always interesting to hear the male's take on things.

oh, and even though i'm not the one flying to DC on saturday, i am SOOO excited for kiwigirl and everyone (including canuckian) in DC! i think the excitement's infectious.

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hmmm...

don't have much to say today, still in limbo of the BIGGEST kind.

i feel like i'm going to have to make some sort of decision soon.

i've been staring at this computer for far too long.

as always, it's time to eat!

CET

thoroughly confused

e stopped over in london today for a few hours...t and i met her at her friend r's house. it was lovely to see e again; we have seen each other in over a year! how time flies. anyhoo, it was a great catch-up. can't wait to see e again back home in t.o. this christmas.

this was the first meeting between t and i since the "king's cross incident". holy crap it was weird/awkward/sad/everything. he came in, hugged e, then said hi to me, looking away quickly. the conversation flowed between the four of us, and he did ask me how my family was doing, especially my grandma; he said he missed the omlettes she used to make him when he was in t.o.. he couldn't look at me directly for long periods of time, it was always a darting glance here and there, but i was guilty of the same.

the four of us walked to baron's court station, then e had to go westbound to heathrow while the three of us went eastbound. we went for a few stops and then t got off the tube first; while on the tube i kept looking at him to see if he would look at me but he didn't, and as the journey progressed you could see that he was getting visibly upset. after he left the train, r turned to me and asked if i was okay, which i obviously wasn't. i started to cry a little from the emotion of it all, right on the bloody train (what is it with me crying in public places?). good thing r had tissue or i would've looked a mess.

so i don't know what to do, what to think, what to feel anymore. i am, as the subject says, thoroughly confused. i think i have to realise that a part of me wants to get back together with him, but the other part wants time and space and a guarantee that it'll work, and that we'll end up happily in canada. the other part also knows that i'm not getting any younger and i don't want to be wasting my time with someone who's not 100% guaranteed when i could be searching for someone else, even though i know nothing is 100% guaranteed. that other part of me also wonders if my eye is done wandering yet, even though t made me so happy.

what the hell is a girl to do?

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HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

hey party people,

just wanted to wish everyone a happy halloween. i know we're all adults here and it's not like we'll be going door to door trick-or-treating, but there's something to be said for dressing up once in a while and gorging yourself on candy.

nothing much to report really. i left g's place and stopped by kiwigirl's place for a tea and a chat; i wanted to make sure i saw her before she left for her vacation to DC. after that i took a long-ass subway ride out to ealing to have sunday roast with my friend, oz girl, and her boyfriend. it was spectacular: roast chicken, roast potatoes with bacon bits, beans, broccoli, carrots, cabbage, caramelized onions with raisins, gravy, MMM...to top it off, for dessert she made a chocolate cake with chocolate sauce on the bottom! it was DEFINITELY worth the trip to ealing (like the old hide house is worth the drive to acton). YUMMMMMY. my belly was in a really happy place after that.

i'm going home now for lunch. two classes today and that's it. i'm going to try to get more rest, as my sore throat is now not sore, but itchy and phlegmy. yay, phlegm.

have a spooky one,
CET

aftermath

so, i'm at g's flat right now, as i stayed over after the party last night. they don't have internet access at all, but someone in their vicinity has wireless internet so bonus for me.

all day saturday g and i prepped for the party. decorations, food, drinks, more drinks, even more drinks...we had to make two trips to the market, as we had so much to carry. we gave ourselves the whole day, but inevitably we were rushing in the end, which ended up being unnecessary as everyone showed up very "fashionably" late!

decorating the flat was good fun, especially stretching out the cotton/synthetic cob-webby things, over lamps, windows, doors, chandeliers, basically everything. i know you don't want to read about me decorating, so onto the party!

about twenty people showed up, of which only three were my friends :( that sucked, royally. i know if i threw the party in t.o. ALL my friends would come, because you're awesome. so i mostly chatted with the evil hypnotist and his girlfriend, when i wasn't doing hostess stuff. the music (or, my laptop) was giving me problems which was annoying, in the end we just busted out the old stereo.

it's funny because it was only when most of the people left that the fun really began! a bunch of latin (i.e. el salvador, columbia, mexico) girls were still here, so we cranked up the latin music and started dancing. the one girl, n, was showing us all these moves but i sucked royally. i consider myself a pretty good dancer, but my hips just cannot move that way! it was like her hips were disconnected from her legs and each were moving to their own rhythm that complemented each other. when the girls left and it was just the flatmates hanging out, we started doing tequila shots and holy crap, INSTANT drunken state achieved. this weekend is where we move our clocks back one hour, so that meant an extra hour of drinking, well, for them anyway, not me, as i feel asleep on the sofa after that. i woke up and moved to the bed, and that was pretty much it for me.

i'm surprised that i don't feel as crappy as i thought i'd feel. we had a lovely breakfast of fruit, yogurt, honey and tea so i think that helped.

overall, the party was alright. not too bad on a week's notice. i'm just glad i saw a few of my friends and got to twirl around in a lovely red flamenco dress. :)

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ex-boyfriends

i got an email today from t regarding a mutual friend who is stopping over in london on her way home to canada from south africa next week; we're all to meet at yet another friend's house for a coffee and a chat. he was responding to my initial email letting him know the time and place. he was very direct and to the point, and other than mentioning the logistics of meeting up with this friend, he said "hope the course is going OK and that you're well." kinda cold, but what should i expect after breaking his heart? well, you can read it as being kind of cold on one hand, but then you can read it and perhaps sense hidden warmth/concern in there? god, am i a girl or what, bloody over-analyzing an email. i don't know, while it's understandable for him to be distant, it still makes me sad.

then my ex-boyfriend, previous to t (and yes, i know you're reading this but i'm going to tell the world anyway!) emailed me to say, jokingly, that "...I never saw you applying your "scientific, analytical side" to "emotions and love", and i'm pretty sure that's because i learned it from him!

gearing up for halloween this weekend...hope the party turns out well! most of my friends cannot make it or haven't confirmed with me yet, poo poo to them! yay yay to those who have said yes and will be there with bells on!

CET

bridging the distance

i got an email today from a friend i hadn't heard from in a while. she lives in the states while her boyfriend lives in alberta. he's in film; she's studying to be a teacher. she said she'll probably move up there next year to teach and to be with him.

my flatmate s is doing her phd here; her boyfriend j (my other flatmate) moved here in september, primarily to be with her.

a part of me envies people who can just pick up and move some place to be with the person they love. another part of me though has absolute no idea why people would be willing to change so much of their life to be with someone. i mean, if you're on a certain path and then someone comes along that might divert you from your path, should you take it? yes, i know, "the road less travelled by makes all the difference", blah blah blah but still. a part of what bothered me about getting back together with t (if we were to get back together) is that him, being english, might divert me from my path. i told him from DAY ONE of our relationship that i was going to settle in canada; it wasn't me being selfish, it was me having a preference, for many, many reasons which i won't get into here. and may i just make clear that my love for him was never "conditional", based on the fact that i wanted to live in canada; i'd like to think it was completely unconditional - i mean, why can't a girl just have a preference on where to live?

over dinner last night ms. journalist said "but what if he's the one?" i'm sorry, but "the one" is complete bull crap. if you're talking about soulmates i think one person can have many soulmates; my sister is my soulmate, my close friends are my soulmates. maybe i'm just not at that point where i'd be willing to do anything for someone i loved (and i mean in a romantic sense, as i would do pretty much anything for my sister and my close friends!).

anyhoo, while i'm extremely happy for my friends and support their decisions, it just left me feeling a little bit sad. my mom says i'm too practical sometimes when it comes to matters of the heart; flatmate j said i can't apply my "scientific, analytical side" to emotions and love. and i say "why not?"

i want to know your opinions on this subject, so email me or leave a comment!

CET

feeling a wee bit better...

my throat's still a little sore but my muscles are less achy which is good...i came home yesterday, took two tylenol and crashed out for an hour and a half. woke up, ate, vegged (as i can't really do homework given my physical state, right?), and then crashed out again. i had better be in tip-top shape by the time my halloween party comes around on saturday!

look at where my priorities are: stay healthy to keep up with schoolwork: NO; stay healthy to party hardy on saturday: YES.

had lunch today with "Mrs. Black" - i'll call her that because she ALWAYS wears black - i used to work with her when i was in london last. i don't know what it is about a good, proper girl chat that makes me feel so much better. we had noodles at the local chinese place near the school. ahhh, noodles...udon noodles...slid down my sore throat like butter...

i'm meeting my friend "Ms. Journalist" (because that's what she does) for dinner tonight in camden. i haven't seen her since christmas! another good catch-up/girl talk to look foward to!

"oprah" still hasn't replied to my halloween invite, hmmm...i'm being nice and extending the hand of friendship, but if she's determined to hold a grudge against me over the next four years we're in school together, then there's not much i can do.

must go home now and do some semblance of homework before heading out to camden.

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i feel like poo...boo!

so i think i'm getting sick.

last night i came home from flamenco with a sore throat and achy muscles, not a good sign. i drank cups and cups of some chinese herbal stuff and went to bed at a decent hour and even got a full night's rest, without the upstairs neighbours waking me up like they usually do. i woke up today and the sore throat has lessened but is still there, along with the achy muscles. crap.

i CAN'T get sick, as g and i are throwing a halloween party this saturday! g's letting me borrow her flamenco dress as my costume, well, provided i'm able to fit into it. i've invited alot of the canadians at school (including "oprah"), but we'll see if she comes. i doubt it! see, am i a nice person or what?

i found out from the girl who marked my pharmacology test last friday that i did really well. in your face dr. p! stick it where the sun don't sunshine, along with my lab report!!!

i have a biochem lab in less than an hour, we're extracting DNA from onion. should be interesting...

CET

the weekend

yes, original title, i know.

hung out with my flatmates on saturday; we went walking around hampstead heath (think big park), did a bit of shopping around muswell hill, then had dinner at a pub near euston (tube station). i had a "toad in a hole" - basically a dough/bread bowl with mash, peas, pork sausages and gravy inside. mmm, pork...

had a late coffee/meet-up with kiwi girl and g, then home.

sunday the flatmates and i checked out the finsbury park sunday market, which started this weekend. it's just a row of trailers/trucks of people selling fruits and veggies, clothes and accessories, and other general stuff. sounds real classy i know. bought a pair of big silver earrings for a pound - obviously not real silver, as it was only a pound - and a bag of cut sugar cane to gnaw on. mmm, sugar cane...reminds me of my childhood...

it was nice hanging out with the flatties, though because they're boyfriend/girlfriend it's gets a little uncomfortable at times - not when/if they act lovey-dovey, but when they argue. i feel like a child in the middle of divorcing parents. i feel like saying "can't we all just get along?" they try to keep their voices down, as if that's going to mask the fact they're fighting in front of me. oh well, that's what i get for living with a couple. it's generally not too bad though, they're good people.

holy crap was chem and biochem today boring or what? i feel like i'm back in high school.

off to eat!

CET

black horse & dr. p

holy shit, what a day.

so there's a tutorial this morning for my pharmacology test, which was at 1pm this afternoon. i didn't go to the tutorial because a) they're generally useless and b) they weren't mandatory. the prof thinks he's god's gift to our world and assumes that we'll understand a concept if he says the same thing, word for word, only slower. we're students, hello, not dumbasses. this is one pet peeve about being a mature student in a class where the majority of students are 18 - the prof treats you like a child.

anyhoo, i get to school well after the tutorial and only THEN do i find out that we were suppose to hand in our lab reports that morning! i race to the prof's office only for him to act like more of a condescending ass, turning me away without accepting my report. and can i just say it was a BEAUTY of a report. so there's a bunch of marks gone, poof, into thin air. he said it won't affect my coursework mark all that much, and to that i say "up yours".

so i had time to kill before the test, and ended up studying with my friend, girl t - a true kindred spirit in all of this first-year craziness. took the test at 1pm and it was fine - i was determined to do well to show the prof that he can't get the best of me.

enough of that crap, i'm just glad the weekend's begun!

KT TUNSTALL ROCKED! she showed up on stage wearing a sparkly blue halter dress with cowboy boots - only musicians can get away with that. my friend, the evil hypnotist, pointed out that her bass player looked like napoleon dynamite - complete with big afro, matching pants/vest circa 1970 and a loud printed shirt. bring on the d-qwon dance moves! the music was awesome and it was great to finally see an artist i've admired for so long. check out her website, www.kttunstall.com - i hope the link works, let me know if it doesn't.

oh, and i found out from the evil hypnotist that instead of t being sad about our breakup, he's angry, really angry. hmmm, don't quite know what to make of that information...would you rather your dumpee be sad and in despair, or raging?

enjoy your weekend!

CET
p.s. mr. bing i got your letter! will reply in kind soon. word to the "d" klan, hehehe...

to have a life

it's funny how boring life gets when you have to study for a test. i log on to post an entry and i think "what was even remotely exciting about my day today?" absolutely nothing!

this term is strange because we have three weeks of pharmacology, while the rest of the term is nothing but chem and biochem. i therefore had my first chem and biochem lectures today and holy crap, it's all review. straight out of OAC chem and biology (for those in Ontario)! at most it touches upon first year chem at waterpoo. i feel like i'm wasting my time. why couldn't they put me directly into second year? well, i guess it's good to review, seeing as how i took first year chem at waterpoo almost ten years ago. holy crap, ten years! can you imagine? it makes me feel old.

anyhoo, saw girl j for dinner yesterday (boy j = flatmate, girl j = friend). was nice to have a catch-up.

t: half of my friends wonder why/what's so wrong with getting back together with him, while the other half agree with my decision. there's nothing wrong with getting back together with him, but at the same time if i did so it wouldn't feel right. it's hard to explain. it's like a gut instinct you have that you can't ignore...my gut instinct is telling me "TIME! YOU NEED TIME!" so that's what i'm doing, giving myself time.

i'm going to study for a few hours before heading to the KT Tunstall concert. CAN'T WAIT!!!

CET

procrastinating

yup, so here i am procrastinating from studying for my test on friday. i woke up at ten, bought groceries, went to the bank and the post office, and here i am at school checking email when i should be hitting the books. it's 3:30pm now and i'm meeting a friend at 5pm for a quick dinner - i mean really, how much studying can i get done in 1.5 hours? might as well start after dinner!

i've been thinking alot about t lately, what he's up to, if he's coping alright. it's funny how much you second-guess your decisions after you go through with them. i'm pretty sure i made the right decision, but i think about all the good times t and i had and it makes me sad. such is love, eh?

oh, and please leave a comment or two if you read my blog - just as you enjoy reading my blog, i enjoy receiving comments on them!

i just want this test to be over so the weekend can begin.

CET

nothing much...

...to report. darth vader is on his way back to pindu's place in farnborough. i should really go home and study tonight, as my test is on friday and i have a concert to go to on thursday. i bought the tickets months ago, who was to know it would be on the night before my first test? this is where procrastination needs to stop and studying needs to begin.

i can't wait for the concert though. KT tunstall's performing, i love her music. i don't know if she's big in canada now or what; when i left, her single was just starting to be played on the radio. i discovered her music while in amsterdam last christmas, she was on a variety show with the cure (which most of you who know me know that they are my favourite band of ALL TIME). she's a singer/songwriter from scotland.

anyhoo, no time for lunch today has made CET hungry. must find food. why i'm writing in the third person, i do not know. must eat.

CET

just because

i'm at the library near my flat, they have wireless internet. just wanted to say hello.

ended up missing my one class for the day. made it to waterloo station with 25 minutes to spare, but then thought "ahhh f@#$ it", as it was a lecture about one of the departments and so had nothing to do with what we need to know for our test this friday. sorted out some things in camden and then headed home to eat and rest up for my flamenco class.

i checked my blog's site meter, and i can see from what parts of the world people are logging onto my blog from. i've had hits from the netherlands, norway, hong kong, saudi arabia, india...i don't know anyone living in these places...i think this is such a cool thing about having a blog, you're reaching people you wouldn't normally reach. sure it's just me and my ramblings, but i think it's neat.

anyhoo, i guess i should go home and eat something before flamenco class. can you tell i'm already procrastinating from studying for my test?

CET

curry and castles

so i'm in farnborough at the moment, southwest of london. a work colleague of mine from canada, let's call him darth vader, has been visiting for the past couple of weeks. he has a friend, pindu, in farnborough, so after a fun day in london on saturday, i came down with them to spend the rest of the weekend here.

in london i took them to the haagen daz restaurant in leicester square, need i say more? heaven in an ice cream cup. we walked around alot, had "thai" buffet near covent garden, then danced to 80's music for a bit before heading to f-boro. the "thai" restaurant was run by chinese people; there was mandarin music playing in the background, and half the dishes weren't thai at all but chinese. i wonder if your average londoner could tell the difference though.

at the club they were playing some serious 80's music. tiffany, whitney houston (twice), lionel richie...and then they played NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK! you know you're old when you're the only one to react to "hangin' tough", as i squealed and nearly doubled over in excitement and shock, while everyone around me looked quizzically at the video playing on the tv screens, wondering what 80's band is this? enough said.

sunday was a lazy morning; woke up late and had a YUMMY lunch made by pindu: BUTTER CHICKEN (homemade!), and lamb keema (minced lamb). my belly was happy. this was followed by an afternoon wandering around windsor, near the castle. we had dinner at a tapas bar and then made our way home.

i have my flamenco class this evening, can't wait! oh, and oprah still hasn't texted back or called...we'll see if she ignores me in class this afternoon...i'm sure shit of some kind will go down...

hope you all had a good weekend!

CET

my first enemy

so i went to school and made a new enemy today! well, i don't hate this girl at all, she just hates me.

okay, so we were having a conversation yesterday and she mentioned how the school gave her a scholarship. i was thinking "what? what scholarship?" i was told that they didn't give out scholarships except in EXCEPTIONAL circumstances (i.e. you're the top student in your COUNTRY and you want to do pharmacy). it sounded like something she applied for so then i'm thinking "why wasn't this scholarship made public?" god knows i need the money, so i was quite upset by this. after class i went to the registrar (who i get along well with because i used to work at the school) to demand an explanation. blah blah blah, long story short, after she explains the scholarship situation she asks me how the international students (especially the canadians) are doing, if they're settling in well, etc.. i tell her so-and-so's doing fine, this person's doing fine, blah blah blah...when it comes to my enemy in question (let's call her oprah, just to be silly), i mentioned that she's found a part-time job at a bar.

so today i'm chatting with some students when i get a call from oprah on my cell, basically telling me off and to mind my own business, because she just came out of a meeting with the registrar where she felt like she was threatened (i.e. get your scholastic act together or you're out). i'm thinking "what?" i told oprah everything i wrote in the above paragraph - i didn't know the registrar was going to single her out - and, for the record, i don't think me mentioning oprah's job was the only reason for that kind of meeting; oprah must be doing something wrong for the registrar to act that way. so yeah, first enemy was made.

now i'm just worried she's going to bad-mouth me to the other canadians but you know what? i can't really give a shit. if people are willing to believe only one side of the story then they're idiots. i just hope they'll actually take the steps to seek out my side of the story before making any judgements.

don't you just love school?

CET

jamie, t and me

saw jamie oliver last night talk about his new book. he's EXACTLY the same in person as on tv. i think that's cool that what you get on tv is what you get in person, though perhaps his "public" persona may not be a reflection of his true self. anyhoo, the guy "interviewing" him on stage was a real idiot, trying to sound all knowledgeable but ending up sounding like a ponce. to keep him from talking, jamie would at times face the crowd and talk to us for about five minutes, just so the interviewer couldn't speak! i like jamie.

i went to the show with t. we walked back to king's cross and were chatting at king's cross for a while and...we talked about where each of us are in our respective lives and what each of us want for ourselves...turns out what he wants did not match what i want (which i knew already), so basically i think i broke his heart by telling him that i need time and space to figure things out. it was horrible, talking and crying at king's cross station, people catching trains around us wondering what the heck is going on. i mean, we've been "exes" since february, but what with me moving to london, thereby pretty much throwing our respective "grieving" processes for a loop and then out the window...this felt more final than the other time, when there was an ocean between us and we were breaking up over the phone. the biggest irony is that the physical distance kept us apart and was the primary reason why we broke up, but now that the physical distance is gone, we're not together...talk about deja vu, as this happened to me previously a long while ago...i sure know a thing or two when it comes to long-distance relationships and irony.

so i went home and cried in the bathroom. my flatmate j came to comfort me which was nice. i think it's just as hard for the "dumper" as it is for the "dumpee", especially when there's still so much feeling there. i love t and still think the world of him, i just know that he can't be in my life in a boyfriend capacity right now. i need to figure out myself, by myself, before i can let someone in. i know i'll be okay - i'm more worried for t than for myself, as this is his first breakup - i guess time will tell the full story.

CET

sweaty, heterosexual and unemployed

today's math class was a joke. the teacher's really nice, but he needed to make sure that we knew what integers, prime numbers, rational and irrational numbers were...um hello, didn't we learn that in grade school? do UNIVERSITY level students really need a refresher on fractions and decimal points? if people don't know these concepts by now they should leave the school immediately, i mean seriously. and what does it say about my school that they accept students like that?

what does this say about the british school system? i don't mean to compare (yet) again, but C'MON PEOPLE!!!

afterwards i wandered around the area asking all the shops if they had vacancies. i ran out of resumes so here i am in the computer lab again to print more. would somebody please just hire me?

i got turned down from a gay and lesbian bookshop the other day because i'm not a lesbian! they say that's their only requirement as alot of teens (who have just come out) and their moms (who they came out to) come in asking for advice. i should've lied and told them i was a lesbian, or at least bisexual. isn't that sexual discrimination? i don't believe this would've happened in canada...what do my friends at the ministry say? i'd like to read your thoughts! anyhoo, i wasn't so much offended as amused.

i won tickets to see jamie oliver talk about his new cookbook tonight!!! i am SO excited. i bought a copy for my sis and hopefully i'll be able to get it signed. i still can't believe i won the tickets, SWEET!

and thank you to those who have emailed me to tell me you're addicted to my blog! leave a comment or two on the blog sometime!

CET

flamenco baby!

so i went to a flamenco class last night!

i've always wanted to learn flamenco. it's such a strong, powerful, sensual dance...i saw joaquin cortez perform once (he does more a flamenco fusion of sorts, but is EXTREMELY hot and EXTREMELY talented) and his performance inspired me. i've also seen more traditional flamenco shows (with l - hey l, hope you're reading this!) and they've been just as good if not better. anyhoo, the long and the short of it is that g introduced me to this class and i absolutely love it!

i was still trying to get the footwork down pat when the instructor added the arms and hands part - did i feel unco-ordinated or what? anyhoo, i'm meeting the instructor tomorrow to go take a look at flamenco shoes, as i have no shoes whatsoever that are adequate for flamenco dancing.

the flamenco class picked my spirits up a bit, as i took the bus ride from hell in the afternoon to camden to a) try to find a job with virgin megastore and b) do some banking. the trip was absolutely futile as a) they weren't looking for any new employees and b) the thing my bank was suppose to have ready for me wasn't ready. ugh. i came home and crashed out - travelling around london sometimes just wipes it out of you. i don't want to compare to home but honestly, never in all my life has the TTC been as bad as yesterday on the london buses and underground.

i have a lab this afternoon, we're playing with guinea pig ileum (intestine). woohoo!

CET

tales from tan & miss ruckus

check out my links, i've added my friends tan (living in dublin, ireland) and miss ruckus (living in the T dot). for those socially/politically conscious internet surfers out there, miss ruckus' page is definitely worth checking out! fight the power!

CET

gobble gobble

once again to all my friends and family in canada, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

saturday night's thanksgiving dinner was a success! i must admit (not too modestly) that my roast chicken kicked ass. YUMMY. the veggies j made were awesome too: butternut squash, mash potatoes, sweet potatoes, carrots, etc. mmm...we had baklava from the local bakery for dessert, along with j's apple crisp. glutton heaven i tell you. my tummy was very, very happy.

j took out his guitar afterwards and was playing a few tunes and singing, and it slowly morphed into a group sing-along. cheesy, i know, but i promise there were absolutely NO renditions of "kumbaya" or whatever, blah. lots of wine was had, so all in all it was a lovely evening.

class was okay today (showed up on time, yeah!); we learned about muscarinic agonist/antagonists, alpha- and beta-blockers. interesting stuff though i'm trying to sort out all the different drugs in my head. i guess this is where the memorization comes in, boo.

i might be applying for a part-time job at a virgin record store! goodness knows i need to supplement my funding somehow. i can only work up to 20 hours a week which is fine, now i just hope they a) need people and b) hire me!

anyhoo, i hope this finds all of you well, eating and drinking lots of good food and wine.

unleash your inner food beast.

CET

thanksgiving and damn wireless internet

so i just tried to post a kick-ass entry and the stupid library wireless internet screwed things up, hence causing me to lose all of it. dammit!

basically i wrote about this:

m: met him last night and he's cuter in person than in the picture kl showed me! we chatted to each other easily which was nice (and comfortable).

pianist: he spoke to us briefly after his set. we want him to play at a party we'd like to throw in a few weeks' time, but we have a feeling he might charge us for it, and alot at that. g will just have to make sure, right g?

thanksgiving: my flatmates and i have invited some canadians to our flat for dinner tonight! i invited four classmates, one from sudbury, one from richmond hill, and two from kingston. i'm making my "famous" roast chicken while j is making a whole bunch of yummy veggies and s made russian potato salad and devil eggs. or is it "deviled eggs"? i don't know.

family: my sis is the only one of my fam who knows about this blog (for now); i love you sis! we will talk this weekend.

finally, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!! i miss everyone back home in canada.

big hug and kiss,
CET

bad impression

so yesterday a friend and i volunteered to be class reps (well, more like i suckered her into it but whatever)...i knew the professor might point us out in class today, and what do i do? i show up late! and he HATES it when you're late. oops. i would've have come in relatively unscathed but he told me to close the door behind me, hence causing everyone to look up and at me. yikes.

don't worry, this blog won't only be about school, i do have some semblance of a social life! am meeting kl and g tonight to watch the pianist play YET again - three weeks in a row, i think this officially makes us stalkers/groupies - followed by a movie in at kl's place. she's bringing her friend m, who currently has a girlfriend but looks really cute from the pictures kl's shown me. no, no, no, we're not breaking up any relationships, i'm just saying he's cute and if he was available i would be interested.

as for t, went around to his house last night and had a really good, much-needed chat. i feel better about things and i guess it's just one of those "we'll have to wait and see" scenarios, and while i hate waiting and seeing i think it's the best we can do right now. it all sounds pretty cryptic but i don't think i'm ready to be completely open in cyberspace yet! and for those who know t don't even THINK about telling him about this site, PLEASE!!! i will tell him in due time...

CET
p.s. i can check through my sitemeter who's checking out my blog, so send me a shout out if you're on. oh, just remember not to use my name!

thoughts of a "mature" student

so we had a lecture today from the career tutor at the school...although the majority of the students in the class are 18 and coming straight from A levels, i still thought her tone was a tad on the condescending side. perhaps i feel it more acutely because i see myself as her peer rather than her subordinate?

i don't know how i feel at the moment about being a "mature" student; i use that term loosely because while i do feel mature at times, it is definitely not ALL the time, plus i look rather young for my age and act rather young too! i am constantly reminded however of how glad i am that i'm 27 and not 18! never in a million years would i want to go back to being 18...25, perhaps, but not 18.

i might be meeting t later, just to chill. i don't really know if i want to open such a BIG can of worms on the public domain...let's just say we have a history...sometimes i want to be as open as kl - i mean i am in "real" life but the www? i may have to ease into it...

oh, and a bit of blog etiquette for my friends who are blog first-timers: try not to use any real names, as this is on the www and i know for a fact (i.e. my site meter) that strangers are logging on. i don't mind at all that they do (i think it's kinda cool in fact), but just the same, keep it anonymous please!

this blog thing is addictive.

CET

asleep in class...

but only for a brief minute! i felt bad because the lecturer was nice and it wasn't like he was boring or anything, it's because i am NOT a morning person...

regarding prof b: no i can't take his picture without being thought of as some kind of freak/stalker, so i guess you'll have to use your imagination! just picture it: dapper, well-dressed, charismatic, older, sexy englishman, mmm...i spoke to our registrar about it (because i used to work with her) and she said that in the past girls have asked to be transferred to another tutor because he makes their knees weak! can you imagine that power??? i think i am going to love my tutor meetings :)

i'm about to have lunch with t, hmmm...more on that later...i really don't know how open i should be on my blog, we will have to see...

oh, and you can all still email me, you don't have to comment on the blog if there's something you don't want the world to know about! this is just to let you all know what i've been up to if i've been really slack or crap at emails...sorry in advance!

CET

prof b

so i had my academic tutor meeting this afternoon with a certain professor b...i have met him before as i worked at the pharmacy school two years ago (long story)...anyhoo, all i have to say is HE IS HOT! damn.

he's older (of course), but not "too" old...he carries a certain "air" of mischevious youth. he dresses VERY sharp - striped shirt (rainbow colours - sounds ugly but it sure wasn't), navy suit, no tie - slight goatee, short, salt-and-pepper hair, speaks with a gorgeous english accent (i'm pretty used to english accents but his is just yummy). when he looks at me i get all nervous (which i'm normally not); my tutor group is pretty small and everyone was quiet, so i ended up doing most of the talking which made me feel loud and silly and girlish for having such a huge crush on a teacher! i mean, are we back in high school here or what?

KL, you would think he's hot too.

damn. can't wait for the next meeting!

first post

there it goes...my blog virginity is gone! POOF!

okay, so my first post. i've decided to join the blogging world and include my voice in the millions that are out there...i hope that whatever i put on this blog will be perhaps a) funny, b) insightful, c) silly and/or d) remotely interesting. it might be virtual suicide by saying this, but let me know what you think!

CET