Monday, May 08, 2006

drowned rat day

buckets of rain falling from the sky today...i don't mind it too much, as it feels like it's cleansing the city...

had a good chat with (funny enough) my ex from university. he's had far more dating experience than i have, so i thought it would be interesting to get his viewpoint on the whole 'casual dating' matter.

i feel kind of 'unpredictable' at the moment, in that i honestly don't know what i am going to do if the opportunity for some action presents itself. nine times out of ten i'm the type of person to say no - this is in NO WAY a comment or reflection on people who say yes the majority of the time, this is just me being me - but for once i feel like i might take that chance, take the plunge and do something out of 'my' ordinary...

anyhoo, i'll end this post by putting up a link to one of the most hilarious videos i've seen in a long time...seriously, you have to watch this!

CET

10 comments:

kiwigirl said...

Here is my take on casual 'dating' (or shagging, or whatever you want to call it).

Isn't it really as simple as asking yourself whether you want to? Are you attracted to him? Does he excite you? Do you want to see more of him?

There are a zillion different reasons why someone decides to sleep with someone - and each person is different in that belief.

But it is such an individual thing right?

So - what feels right for you?

And this is from the girl who had some absolutely fantastic sex this weekend - with a person that she just met :) And why did I sleep with him - because I wanted to :) HA

xxx K

Canuckian's Evil Twin said...

by casual dating i mean the opposite of being friends with someone before being their significant other. to me, casual dating is about getting to know the other person while at the same time (possibly) having sex, or at the very least being somewhat physical.

'friends become lovers' - the physical stuff comes second, after the getting to know you bit

'casual dating' - the physical stuff AND the getting to know you bit happen at the same time

as for frenchie, do i want to? yes. am i attracted to him? sort of. does he excite me? kinda. do i want to see more of him? sure.

i don't know if i'm excited BY him or by the idea of getting it on WITH him...therein lies the dilemma...

CET

kiwigirl said...

haha - well both are good reasons to shag then huh? HAHA!

I think the problem is, by our age, most people have dated people they have not been friends with first.

Yours is more of an unusual situation I think.

But really - it isn't that different - surely?

You still need to take things at the speed you are comfortable with.

xx K

Anonymous said...

if you want to, i say go for it. just make sure to be safe and use condoms.. and always feel that you can back out at any time you feel uncomfortable. you have every right to say "no" evem in the middle of the act and he will need to respect that (otherwise, it's sexual assault or rape).

by the way, london was where i learned to be 'slutty' (i don't say that in a derogatory way at all - sex positive all the way!). fun times and it can make you feel very empowered (contrary to popular sexist belief)! as an ex said to me later (after we slept together on the first date), he thought i made a very adult decision so it was no big deal. like i said, it can be a very empowering experience to go for what you want.

enjoy!

Canuckian's Evil Twin said...

"You still need to take things at the speed you are comfortable with." - DEFINITELY!

"...it can be a very empowering experience to go for what you want." - I AGREE!

CET

Anonymous said...

Casual dating is like wearing a bikini. You're not sure if you should, but ten years later you're gonna wish you did when you were still young enough to look good doing it.

Awesome video!

Say, how do you know closednet AND grace?

Canuckian's Evil Twin said...

jessica: VERY true comment...it reminds me of a birthday card a co-worker showed me; on the front was a very sour-looking old lady with a birthday cake in front of her, and on the inside of the card was the thought running through her head, "i should've fucked every man i laid eyes on when i was 18."

i met closednode at a dinner over christmas holidays, and i've been reading grace's blog through his website, though i've never met or seen her before.

how did you find me, through closednode?

thanks for your comment, i think it really helps!

CET

Canuckian's Evil Twin said...

well duh i'm stupid, of course you would've found me through closednode and grace, otherwise you wouldn't ask! sorry, mental lapse...

any boys out there that want to comment but are afraid to? i want to read a few opinions from the male perspective...

damnit, this stupid pharmacy practice assignment will not write itself! argh!

CET

J.L said...

seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeexxxxx

Canuckian's Evil Twin said...

thanks jason, thanks for representing your half of our species so eloquently :o)

i'm sure all the guys out there reading this are like "do it! DO IT!!!"

MMMMWWWWWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, we shall see...

CET